A lot of people fall in love, and that is easy. The hard part is staying in love. Here is a great way to keep love going for a lifetime. I call it the 5 Minute Daily Date.

I do a lot of marriage counseling, and this is my go-to first step. Here is how it works (the simplified version).

I ask couples to do something for 3 weeks. At the end of every day, before they go to bed, spend 5 minutes telling the other person why they love each other.

The first night it goes well, but the key for the next night is to think of something different to say to them.  This makes nights 2 through 5 difficult.

The point of this exercise is that it forces us to actually think about the person we are in love with, why we are in love with them, and why we still want to be in love with them throughout our day. Knowing you have this 5-minute date at the end of the day will force you to look at those you love in a different and better way, even when things aren’t going so well.

This is why it must be at the end of the day right before bed, because if you just do it in the morning, you are then free to forget about the person during the day. If you are in love with that person, you should want to think about them more often.

There is also another benefit of doing it before bed. How you go to sleep is key. God says in Ephesians 4:26 to not let the sun go down on your anger. Let’s face it, we will all have bad days, and we will not be feeling the love, so to speak. God is not saying you will resolve the conflict. It may still be there, but despite the conflict, you will choose to not go to bed angry. If you go to bed angry, the devil can play with your mind while you sleep. It won’t be peaceful, and the situation can actually get worse as the devil plays with your mind as you sleep. If you go to bed saying loving things, then God can give you peace and rest and work on the resolution to the conflict in ways that you may not have thought of.

How you go to sleep will have a great effect on your rest and thus on the next day.

Once one gets past the 5-day mark, it gets easier because you have gotten through the tough part. You are teaching yourself, that no matter what happens, you love that person, and now you are consciously looking for the good in that person.  You are looking for something loving to say to them. Now the relationship is more alive because they are in your thoughts all through the day. in a good way.

After 21 days, it will become a habit, a good habit, that will bring great benefit to your relationship.

One more thing, most people say a prayer before going to bed. When you pray, do you think of something nice to say to Jesus? Do you think Jesus would like to hear something heartfelt from you? I am sure He would. Now, just imagine if we did that daily. What to do you think Jesus will say and do for you in return? Just imagine! Remember it is all about a relationship and keeping the relationship alive.

Try the 5-minute date with the one you love and with Jesus and see if both relationships don’t go to another level. What do you have to lose? If nothing happens. you are exactly right where you are now. However, if something does happen, imagine how good it can be, and then realize it can be even better than you imagine!

Also, remember this is only my go-to first step, there are others, but this one really sets the tone for a love that will continue to grow and not get stale.